Demi Lovato is revealing more details about her eating disorder and what caused her to relapse in 2018.
On The Ellen DeGeneres Show Thursday, she reveals her old management team used to control her food, even removing the phone from her hotel room so she couldn’t call room service. For many years she didn’t have a birthday cake, eating a slice of watermelon with fat-free whipped cream instead.
“I think at some point it becomes dangerous to try to control someone’s food when they’re in recovery from an eating disorder,” she tells Ellen.
Demi says her eating disorder continued to get worse and she tried reaching out for help, but her team accused her of being “selfish” and played on her fear of abandonment.
“I was stuck in this unhappy position and here I am sober and I’m thinking to myself, ‘I’m six years sober but I’m miserable. I’m even more miserable than I was when I was drinking. Why am I sober?’” she says.
Demi adds, “That night, I went to a party and there was other stuff there, and it was only three months before I ended up into the hospital with an OD.”
She admits, “Ultimately, I made the decision that got me to where I am today,” but she wants to send a message to others struggling that they can get through it and come out the other side.
“As long as you take the responsibility, you can move past it and learn to love yourself the way you deserve to be loved,” she says.
Demi’s new song, “I Love Me,” spreads that very message. She shared a sneak peek of the song and its video during her appearance on Ellen. The song comes out Friday.
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